Consider my timbers... shivered.
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on walking in the park one evening during the pandemic, listening to music:
[the song that started playing] was I’ll Get You, which is really a true 50/50 Paul and John song, and as I listened, the song slipped behind my defences so easily that it took me a moment to realize what was happening, that I was hearing it, first in indistinct glimmers, then completely, with the same ears as I had when I was little.
It sounds so slight the day afterward, like most such experiences. But it wasn’t. When the song ended I put on a random Beatles playlist, practically in a trance. I didn’t even want to look at my phone for long enough to get distracted by a text, I didn’t want to lose the feeling, and walked for hours through the night, listening. I had put so much of myself inside those songs for safekeeping.…
There are millions of bigger Beatles fans than I am, but I feel stubbornly certain in my heart that no one can love the Beatles more than I do. They were incredibly alive to me from the moment I heard them. Looking back, I think it was their joyfulness I found so mesmerizing. Even their saddest songs have an undercurrent of happiness. (You’re never too far from a 7th chord with the Beatles.)
I think it’s because they were four working class kids whose crazy plan had actually worked. Especially in their early pictures they look dumbstruck to be so famous and gifted and rich and happy. It’s there in their first perfect song, Please Please Me. A minute and a half in, John and Paul mess up the lyrics, then sort of cover it as they launch, with John laughing — but not to the listener, just caught up in the happiness of the playing with Paul, this other genius he found in Liverpool — and then covering the laugh with the start of the chorus.…
Last night, I listened to all of it. In my head I tracked the other songs in which various band members laugh (I Should Have Known Better, It’s Only Love, If I Fell, etc.) and observed with intense satisfying scrutiny just how weird and sad and good John’s parts of A Day in the Life are, so much of each that it’s hard to believe it’s a part of mainstream culture… until you remember that one of Paul’s transcendent gifts is to lift the sensation of hopelessness from a song without rejecting its presence.
I listened to I’ve Got a Feeling. “Everybody had a hard year.” I nodded, in the misting dark, as I headed home. In my defence it was very late by then. Everybody had a hard year. -
“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?
“In the same way your heart feels and your mind thinks, you, mortal beings, are the instrument by which the universe cares. If you choose to care, then the universe cares. If you don’t, then it doesn’t.” - Brennan Lee Mulligan, Fantasy High S1E17
(via dragonomatopoeia)
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4x01:
4x01:
4x01:
4x01:
just painted an onion on a cutting board and i think it’s the peak of my artistic career
look at her…
she gets stronger!
the full painting is finally complete!
This is giving me emotions that I myself do not fully understand
Maybe you’re just tearing up because someone has been cutting onions
(via spongebobssquarepants)
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Got an ad for a self-tanning product and “Perfect natural looking tan” is not how I’d describe it
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“I love cats! I’m on a diet!”
I love this. I shared it earlier in a way that greatly angered the Tumblr police. So this is my community service.
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I made another thing.
With apologies to Neil Gaiman.
No apologies needed.
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If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:
Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say “yes”, the second will say “no.”
If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.
But what if people question you from there? “Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?” For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: “I don’t have a card for that.”
“What the fuck,” they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: “I have laryngitis. I’ve lost speech. My throat hurts”. Whatever you expect to occur.
The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. They wonder about logistics. “How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?”
As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.
“I have powerful wizard magics.”
Gets them every time
(via krystal-prisms)
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toxic codependent familial dynamics this. toxic codependent romances that. what about toxic codependent coworkers. i can’t do my job without this guy here or i’ll kill myself.
(via marisatomay)
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white 44 year old twitter user with a03 addict in their bio: omg the dad from cocomelon is actually kind of a litty dilf? and his relationship with the mailman is kind of enemies to lovers villaincore let me know if i should make them both pee on eachother
worlds youngest and yet most verbose baby online: can you seriously like knock if off man im trying to learn about the rhombus
white 44 year old twitter user with a03 addict in their bio: fuck off worlds youngest and yet most verbose baby. just another puriteen minor inserting themselves into adult spaces. go play in the sandbox Also heres ur dox: 123 Circle Road ….. yea i have that….if someone shows up to your house and shoots you and kills you then thats deserved 🤷♂️ know your fucking place and get the hell out of the cocomelon fandom if youre not ready to see dark topics
a scientist at mit about to change the world forever: i just made my own centipede by sewing all the dead flies in my room together with all the dead ants in my room 😃☝️
the first man made centipede: kill me again
(via miseria-fortes-viros)
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I never understood why “Sucks dick” means “Thing nobody likes” should be the polar opposite “This meal is so good, it sucks dick!” You know? OH SHIT
?
2003-2008 Lexus RX 330
(via juliuscaesarofficial)
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what if a rat said cheesus christ
for the Spanish crowd: y si las ratas dijeran quesucristo
im so fucking angry because “cheesus christ” made me smile, but “quesucristo” made me choke on a laugh
(via miseria-fortes-viros)
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The Beatles Reveal Themselves!
While on a recent visit to France, the Fab Four were collared to fill in a special questionnaire based on questions asked by Marcel Proust, a famous French author who died at the beginning of this century. During Proust’s lifetime filling in the questionnaire became a craze among French people, for your answers are supposed to reveal your true character.
On the following pages we’ve reproduced each Beatle answer – in their own handwriting – just as they wrote them. And on page 56 you can read just what was revealed in their character.
Unfortunately, although John also filled in his questionnaire, his answers were unprintable!
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“Paul was John’s sounding-board, of course, and George had a huge amount of input, which, to my eternal regret, I didn’t sufficiently recognise at the time, but Ringo’s opinion was always important to John, just because he knew that with him there’d never be any bullshit. He’d often turn to Ringo and ask what he thought and if Ringo said, ‘That’s crap, John,’ he’d do something else.”
GEORGE MARTIN, “John Lennon: The Life” by Philip Norman
(via elvispresley)
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